FACIM D3: Kinky Sex is Outrageous
The day began with Bonnie practicing her Bach. (I’ve been warned… no more Bach jokes, so anything I said yesterday I would just like to apologize, and take it Bach.)
When we went to the morning session I saw Marie on the sofa in the lobby so sat down and had a nice long chat with her, and she accepted an invite to spend the evening with us.
Right before class Ken stopped by our seats to ask Bonnie if she’d play after the morning break. He mussed my hair, but Bonnie said it was a good look so I just went with it.
The morning session focused a little more on the “grab bag o’ guilt”. Here’s a sampling of notes:
• The problem is never the grab bag (the content of the wrong mind, or what happens in the world) it’s why I would want to reach into the bag.
• When the decision maker is in the right mind it becomes an observer (of the ego). We recognize there is something other than the ego to choose, and we become aware of our power as a decision maker. This recognition, when we revert back to the ego, engenders tremendous conflict and pain because we become aware of the threat to our identity, and also because we’re aware of what we’re choosing against. The sense of conflict won’t end until we get tired of it (of going back and forth, back and forth) and choose against the ego once and for all, saying, “I never want this again”, in recognition of the tremendous cost of individuality.
• You have no idea how helpful it is to know what you’re doing. Even if you’re addicted to judgment, don’t fix it, don’t change it, don’t agonize over it. Indulge all your specialness; just be aware of what you’re doing, and that it’s costing you the peace of God. That is extremely helpful information.
• To accept the gifts of God means to look at the ego’s gifts and say, “I don’t want these anymore.” To say yes to Jesus is to say no to the ego.
• We love to be hurt, anxious, sad etc…. it doesn’t feel that way, but that’s part of the camouflage.
At the morning break Mary Pat and Ray (regulars who have been with Ken for years, even from before the Course was published) slipped us an envelope with an invitation and directions to their house for Thursday lunch. They’re having a bunch of people over for sandwiches and chips. Did somebody say chips??
When the break ended Bonnie performed the Bach and for the rest of the day had a lot of kind people come up and give her nice compliments. It’s a great way to meet people; I’m thinking of juggling tomorrow. Preparation has begun in earnest for the “Celtic Lament”. The performance is on Thursday.
We gave Gayle a drive back to the hotel for lunch, and then she also came back to the Foundation with us, which was nice company. Erik was over for lunch again, and Bonnie and Yvonne both had a catnap right before we left.
The afternoon session was all about being kind to ourselves and others. It should be noted Ken did use the words “kinky sex” several times (in response to a question about doing an outrageous thing for your brother). I just want to know one thing: When did kinky sex become outrageous? Ken took the opportunity to remind the class how disappointed everyone was when he did his workshop on sex.
One thing Ken mentioned that so many Course students get confused about is, well, level confusion. Level one is when the Course is contrasting Truth and illusion (Awake or asleep). Level two deals with the illusion, contrasting the right and wrong minded thought systems; comparing the happy dream of the right mind with the nightmares of the wrong mind.
Here are a couple notes from the afternoon:
• Don’t give people advice based on the theory of ACIM, give it to them based on the love of ACIM.
• Ken told people to not be harsh with themselves, to just do their best, and reminded us of the line where Jesus says, “If you do my will I will uphold it. If you don’t do my will, I will correct it (meaning: you will have other opportunities).”
• To invoke the miracle when you’re in pain is to take the pill without guilt. If you think, “If I was a good ACIM student, I wouldn’t need a pill” then you’re the “worst” kind of ACIM student… (i.e. pushing Jesus away, judging yourself, level confusion, misunderstanding the miracle, form over content etc.)
• It doesn’t matter why you are sick. That’s in the past. To dwell on the why is ego. If i ask Jesus what to do he will say, “Hang out with me”, and then you will know what to do. If you get a flat tire, change the goddamn tire! It doesn’t matter why it happened. Now that it has happened it has become a neutral event, and the question becomes, “Am I going to change the tire with Jesus or the ego?” That’s all.
After class Erik, Gayle, Marie and Lonni came over to hang out with me, Bonnie, and Yvonne, and it was just a fun night of being with friends. Gayle brought wine (private note to Jesus: I didn’t have any — Bonnie and the others did), bread, hummus and pesto. Marie brought organic coconut and pineapple juice. Lonni’s array of chocolaty treats were still in full force… so everyone was well-fed. Add in some great conversation and company, and it was a great evening. There are rumors it could happen again (but some people may have been a little tipsy when this was discussed, so we’ll see).
Tomorrow we’ve been invited out to lunch with Noree and Jeff, and it looks like Dana might be tagging along.
Oh, I promised an update on Gayle’s (Olive Us Are One) tee-shirt. She didn’t get one after all, but Erik was wearing a tee-shirt that said, “JESUS LOVES YOU” then underneath it said, “But I’m His Favorite”, so that more than made up for it.
Lonni swore he stole it from her, but I don’t believe her.
