Normal is as Normal Does
As we all know, there is a marked tendency for us Course students to be — well, how could I describe it? I dunno — three fries short of a Happy Meal? You know, weird. “Not normal”. Crazed up on Course-y beans. And when I say “marked tendency” I mean unchecked rampant and flagrant acts of weirdness. Two ticks from cuckoo-ville. And, tragically, there’s an extremely high rate of recidivism. In fact, I bet that right now, somewhere, there is a Course student being somewhat-to-extremely not normal.
In an attempt to reach out to that person and to help cut down on abnormalcy-crimes everywhere, and to protect their hapless victims, I decided I would share an example of what it is to be normal. If only one instance of Course-craziness can be prevented, it will be worth it.
For my example of normalcy, I would like to present to you the staff at the Foundation for A Course in Miracles. (The crowd gasps! No! No! It’s all-ACIM-all-the-time there, I’m sure of it! Why, they must play ACIM board games and nibble ACIM-cakes for lunch! And.. and leave the mopping and such to the Holy Spirit when they turn the lights off for the night! And only wear lavender, or white, or maybe lightly-shaded hues of blue. Please don’t take this from me!)
Exhibit A is heresy, but I shall present it anyway. Before workshops Ken gives us various guidelines that if proffered at some ACIM groups, the teacher might be told “It’s all an illusion, dude. Chilllllllll.” But no. Ken asks us some combination of the following:
…that we not ask to put food in the staff refrigerator because there’s not enough room for everyone
…that we don’t park in the parking lot next door even though they are no longer in business and the parking lot is empty
…that we not put our adhesive name tags on the chairs so that the staff doesn’t have to clean off the residue
…that we not inch our chairs out into the aisles as the week goes on
…that maybe we could all turn our cell phones off
…that we not bring food or drink into the teaching auditorium
…that we return the plastic shell of our name-tags at the end of the week
Clearly, he is not saying:
…rummage through the closets in the staff kitchen and take whatever you want (to have all give all to all).
…have a good and loud phone conversation with a loved one in the middle of class (there are no coincidences, clearly you must accept the call).
…spread out a Happy Meal on your lap, slurp on your milkshake, and feel free to drip ketchup on the floor (nothing I see in this room means anything / my holiness envelops everything I see).
Okay, enough with the heresy; time to close this case with some pictorial evidence. Let’s look around the grounds at the Foundation:
Is your vehicle unauthorized? It WILL be towed away. At our expense? No. At YOUR expense. To your driveway, pointed in the right direction for you to leave for work in the morning? NO, parked backward and upside down in an impound lot squeezed between four semis. Okay, I made that last one up. But maybe.
Do you like to steal copper wiring from our electrical panel? We will slap a big ol’ padlock on it, and set an alarm to protect it from happening again. An alarm to come give you a hug and some nice Course conversation over Course cakes in the staff kitchen? No, to take you to nearest police station and eventually to court. The “higher court” where the case against you will be dismissed? NO, the kind of court where you might go to prison. The kind of prison where the door is open and you can leave simply by walking out? NO, the kind where you have ample time to read the Course and ruminate on that passage.
Note that we don’t see any signs that say:
All Sons of God (that means you holy brother!) Can Park Here: Unauthorized vehicles will be washed and detailed by a member of our staff after-hours and free of charge.
nor,
ALERT! Attention: Please feel free to open these doors should you need copper wiring to support your daily needs. The key is under the big rock to your right. (It’s wrapped in a $20 in case that would help you out.)
See? Normal.
